How can you plan your healing after passive aggressive relationships?
If you have been living for some time within the passive aggressive cycle of abuse, there is some healing to be done!
First, let's use a bit of time to go over what are the possible impacts on you. Even if you don't see them clearly, it is possible that you have been affected in several aspects of your personality.
Let's list some of the possible effects, estimating that you have been in this relationship around 2-3 years?
After a consistent passive aggressive cycle of abuse, you can expect to define yourself as having or being:
- poor self-esteem;
- confused about what you aspire to do with your life;
- insecure about your intellectual capacity;
- waiting to receive permission to say what you want;
- intimidated and forced to squash your creativity in order not to receive his angry critiques.
This is a self-destructive situation that will not improve by itself. You will become more and more poor in enthusiasm, energy and motivation to achieve your dreams. After getting to be for more time in this relationship, it will be difficult to remember the vital, healthy person you were at the beginning...
And you don't want to realize after twenty years, that the progressive devastation of your dreams has continued, right?
I.- Self Help with passive aggressive husband?
Wondering what can you do by yourself, if you happen to have not immediate help around?
Here are the Steps:
Recognize that you are participant in his crooked and sad vision of what a marriage is; now, tell yourself this is not the marriage you deserved
Hear you deep voice saying that you can't taker loneliness and abandonment any longer, and make it real this time
Walk around your house and say goodbye to the lack of love, attention, sex and recognition you experience just here...
If you need to cry, do it while saying : I cry because I'm saying goodbye to all this misery...."
Now, with tears or not, go to your desk and write down your own plan to recover yourself:
II.- Think about taking back power from a passive aggressive man
Here are the Steps:
Get to accept that all his shenanigans are only coming from a poor, deficient and insecure attachment with his mother/caretaker;
Give up the pretense that you are responsible for his behavior; it was learned way before he met you!
Look around and finally see the poor environment you are developing with him, and detach: this is NOT what your dreams promised you;
And tell yourself not to fear change any minute longer, in order to go/have/be where you want to be...
Do some deep breathing inhalations and feel the negative and love-starved context he put you in, and imagine yourself walking out to a sunny, warm space.
Now, write down your vision of who you want to be, and what you want to be doing....
NOW, would you like to add here your own steps? Those that you have developed after so much thinking and praying, and that have worked for you?
You can either leave a comment at the bottom, or go to "ASKNORA" and post your comment... We love hearing from you! Thanks a lot!
Meanwhile, if you want more information by reading this interesting text:
Or, you can get extra help by rebuilding your self esteem, here