If you are living in a passive aggressive marriage, do you feel like you just can’t stand another holiday with this person but can’t imagine spending a holiday alone? The holidays often bring on a confusing increase in passive aggressive behaviors, as well as a heightened sensitivity to the pain these behaviors inflict, making you question whether you can really go on having yet another Happy Holidays be ruined by your partner.
Passive Aggressive behaviors develop from broken or unhealthy attachments early in life. With the holidays filled emotional pressure based on internal needs, nostalgia, social pressure and the needs of a partner to connect, love and be close, a person with that Avoidant attachment style he developed as a child is in a very uncomfortable place. You are likely feeling similar pressures, hoping to have love, romance, support and connection with your partner at this supposedly love-filled time of year. On top of this, with many extra opportunities to be close, care for you, support you and bond with you, your partner has that many more opportunities to strike out, with his passive aggressive behavior, hurting and controlling you.
Understanding what makes the holidays so much more difficult for both your passive aggressive partner and for you may help you not only get through with less pain this year, but also encourage you both to start making critical repairs to your relationship. It is an emotionally trying time for both of you, a time when you need to understand each others time a little more and work toward building a needs-fulfilling relationship. Read here to learn more about passive aggression at the holidays, how intimacy is affected by passive aggression and how your husband can Stop his Passive Aggressive Behaviors.