When I feel like "I’m Walking on Eggshells," the dream I’m yearning for is… confidence.
An overwhelming 92% of the responses expressed dreams consistent with the following wishes:
1. “I wish that he loved to hear what I had to say and that it was as important to him as it was to me. I would like to feel that all topics are open between us, and that if disagreements arose we could resolve them calmly, and head straight to the solution. If only he would stop ignoring or avoiding things by weaving a complicated, confusing web around the issue. When this happens, it creates one more conflict that will not be dealt with.”
2. “I have been married to a PA man for 46 years. Don’t gasp! After years of guilt, I finally found an explanation and came to terms with what I had been living with. I have learned to detach emotionally and physically and moved away from husband, which seems to have improved our relationship. Not many people realize how lonely it is being the wife of a PA husband, even though he’s such a “nice guy! My dreams of having a husband who loves, cherishes and protects me, never came about. I am realistic enough to love myself, and now I make the most of the positive things in my life. It is living one day at a time.”
3. I want to be freed from that feeling of, “What’s wrong with him now?” I want him to share with me what his needs, desires, and ideas are. He won’t (or can’t), and I can’t do it for him. Only he can.
4. In my heart and soul, I truly desire that we freely share all the possibilities of life, together. I know that I’m a wonderful person, but sometimes you need that encouragement, that validation, and that respect to come from your partner instead.
In what other ways would you know he is emotionally available?
· “I can be open, honest, and natural with my partner, and I know he will not think less of me if he knows who I really am.”
· “He acknowledges and listens attentively to my feelings and ideas.”
· “He lets me know that my feelings are just as important as his.”
· “I know I won’t be punished for bringing up certain things.”
· “I can be myself in my own home and can truly speak my mind, and so can he.”
· “There is such freedom of ideas between us that I feel like I am flying.”
· “We connect and care for each other on such a deep level that we can say what needs to said, and there is never any fear of retaliation, derision, or feeling foolish.”
I simply need to be myself.
NOW that you deeply acknowledge this need to be yourself, to accept and value yourself and do away with all the hidden negativity and criticism of the "walking on eggshells" behavior...how are you going to allow yourself to be the unique and valuable person you are? How are you going to detach from his critiques and appreciate who you are, first and only?