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	<title>Passive Aggressive Husband &#187; passive resistance</title>
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		<title>Is Your Passive Aggressive Husband in Denial?</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-husband-denial/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-husband-denial/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 29 Apr 2011 14:30:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive definition]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive personality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[toxic relationship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[confusion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[control]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[denial]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional needs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hurt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[isolation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive resistance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[responses]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sadness]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[Some of the hardest tasks in healing the passive aggressive man are dealing with his various ways of denying his own behavior. What are the ways a passive aggressive may deny his toxic behavior? There are four main kinds to discuss here: • Denial of Facts • Denial of Awareness • Denial of Responsibility • [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-husband-denial/">Is Your Passive Aggressive Husband in Denial?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/break-silence-wall/' rel='bookmark' title='How to Break Through his Silence Wall'>How to Break Through his Silence Wall</a> <small>Understanding passive aggression is not as hard as it seems....</small></li>
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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Some of the hardest tasks in healing the passive aggressive man are dealing with his various ways of denying his own behavior.</p>
<p>What are the ways a passive aggressive may deny his toxic behavior?</p>
<p>There are four main kinds to discuss here:</p>
<p>• Denial of Facts<br />
• Denial of Awareness<br />
• Denial of Responsibility<br />
• Denial of Impact</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Denial of facts: many passive aggressive people will try to rearrange or fabricate past events to suit their present situation. They may (when the two of you recount it later on) change what was said in a fight last week, so that you are now the one who comes out looking bad this time. Sometimes, a denial of facts will mean you hear this go-to response: &#8220;I didn&#8217;t say that. I didn&#8217;t do that. That never happened. I don&#8217;t know what you&#8217;re talking about.&#8221;</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Denial of awareness: this is the &#8220;poor me&#8221; or victim card. When confronted about their behavior, a passive aggressive may say, &#8220;Yes, I see that I did x, but it was because I care about you and want to make you happy&#8230; how come you aren&#8217;t happy with me buying a new TV for you?&#8221; In this way, he makes himself out to be the misunderstood victim, full of good intentions but with a demanding spouse like you.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Denial of responsibility: a passive aggressive person may deny he has any responsibility or obligation to watch what he says or does (much like a child). He refuses to believe seriously that there are grown up responsibilities of his role as husband and father&#8230;It&#8217;s exhausting for you to remind him over and over that he has 50% of responsibility for the marriage moral, emotional and financial upkeep.  This is also part of the power games that passive aggressive people play; denial of responsibility involves maintaining a facade of power and control while doing the less he can, so he has time and resources for his playful interests.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Denial of impact: a little similar to denial of facts, a denial of impact occurs when the passive aggressive insists that his behavior is not really harming any one. In this type of denial, it is the wife, the children, and the friends who are wrong/controlling/demanding/over-reacting. He will say that the wife is the one who is going crazy, that her depression is from some other source, (surely organic, genetic, etc)  and that perhaps <em>she </em>should be the one to see a therapist, not him.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Which leads us to one last point: even with these stages of denial revealed, what else is at work when a passive aggressive man denies having a serious problem and is in need of some deep changes in order to stay married? Why does he deny in the first place?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">What we learn when we study passive aggressive behavior is that there is often a fear of shame involved when he thinks about admitting any kind of fault. As a child, the passive aggressive man would have been exposed to large doses of shame &#8211; either shame for his own mistakes, or seeing others shamed for theirs. The end result may have been public humiliation from peers, private abuse in the home, or other events that instilled in him a fear of making mistakes or looking &#8220;bad.&#8221;</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ultimately, it is this fear that leads the passive aggressive man to deny that he has done anything wrong. It is this fear that leads him to say, &#8220;I don&#8217;t need therapy, you do.&#8221; The best way for him to avoid admitting a mistake (and thus, feeling shame) is to not only take attention off himself, but direct it at someone else.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">This is the passive aggressive&#8217;s tragic state of affairs &#8211; he is the person who most needs an affirmation of self-worth, but he is also the person who continually rids himself of the best chances of having help by persisting in behaviors so toxic as to risk losing the spouse&#8217;s love.</p>
<div class="neilauthor" style="text-align: justify;">
<div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion.  You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today, by getting the ebook &#8220;The Art of Living with a <a href="http://www.passiveaggressivehusband.com/pa_husband/">Passive Aggressive Husband</a>&#8221; .</div>
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<p style="text-align: justify;">&nbsp;</p>
<div id="crp_related"><h3>Related Posts:</h3><ul><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/deal-passive-aggressive-husband-2/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">How to deal with passive aggressive husband</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/appreciation-confront-passive-aggressive-husband/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Using appreciation to confront a passive aggressive husband?</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/620/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Has Your Relationship Become Toxic?</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/prevent-passive-aggression-child/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Avoid Teaching Passive Aggression to Your Child</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">How passive aggressive can you be?</a></li></ul></div><p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-husband-denial/">Is Your Passive Aggressive Husband in Denial?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>
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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/break-silence-wall/' rel='bookmark' title='How to Break Through his Silence Wall'>How to Break Through his Silence Wall</a> <small>Understanding passive aggression is not as hard as it seems....</small></li>
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		<title>Passive Aggression: Stop Welcoming It Home!</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-stop-welcoming-it-home/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-stop-welcoming-it-home/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 21 Mar 2011 21:06:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive personality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cold shoulder]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional needs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[expectations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[frustrated]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[identity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[isolation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive resistance]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[So you are wondering how you ended up getting involved with a man that you now discover to be passive aggressive&#8230; Why, if you loved and love yourself, if you had a strong self-esteem, did you wind up with a man who might claim that he loves you, but whose actions (or lack thereof!) state [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-stop-welcoming-it-home/">Passive Aggression: Stop Welcoming It Home!</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/prevent-passive-aggression-child/' rel='bookmark' title='Avoid Teaching Passive Aggression to Your Child'>Avoid Teaching Passive Aggression to Your Child</a> <small>Have you always wondered where your husband learned to be...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/break-silence-wall/' rel='bookmark' title='How to Break Through his Silence Wall'>How to Break Through his Silence Wall</a> <small>Understanding passive aggression is not as hard as it seems....</small></li>
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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: justify;">So you are wondering how you ended up getting involved with a man that you now discover to be passive aggressive&#8230; Why, if you loved and love yourself, if you had a strong self-esteem, did you wind up with a man who might claim that he loves you, but whose actions (or lack thereof!) state the contrary?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Just so that we understand each other better, let’s quickly review exactly what passive-aggression is: a behavior between couples involving resistance to do any shared projects, or one person doing exactly what he had in mind even if both might have decided that you were going to do something together. The end result when nothing happens because he &#8220;forgot&#8221; is utter frustration and loneliness for you.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">So how come the men in your life seem to all have followed this pattern of behavior, where they constantly keep you wondering about their true intentions, and if they are going to keep their promises or not, and end up frustrating you in the end?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">In most cases, it is actually safe to assume that a good part of the reason why women unconsciously end up dating men who are passive aggressive… is because they like it. Now, don’t scoff at this yet and keep reading. As humans, we tend to be drawn to things that are familiar, and therefore make us feel “safe” whether we realize it or not. Same as with things, we unconsciously look for behaviors that we “know” and towards which we already have the mechanics to react to; so we –although it might drive us crazy- are attracted towards those who exhibit them.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">So, how come women <em>like</em> this “safe” and “familiar” behavior to the point that they end up actually looking for partners who exhibit it? Well, if this is your case, chances are that you come from a family where one or both parents controlled the relationship via passive aggression, and this got you used to interacting with the behavior since childhood. You probably felt helpless being caught up in this family dynamic because much like in your present, back then, one person was getting their own way by silently maneuvering around the other person whilst the recipient was no doubt pissed off and frustrated at their behavior and the results of it. You probably tried to help but were likely powerless, <em>so in adulthood, it’s almost like righting the wrongs of your past by trying to be successful in surpassing this behavior</em>. So you are possibly looking for a passive aggressive person to tame into a good husband.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Trouble is that by repeating the same interaction from your past, you are sure to <strong>be frustrated like your mother/father was because getting the same results, year after year, and once again, the more you push, the more the other person resists the pushing and withdraws into cold shoulder and other PA behaviors.</strong></p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">How did you entered into this cycle? Probably because you wanted to help him because by him looking helpless or feigning helplessness about his problems, he invited the “helper” in you to appear and intervene in his behalf.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">It’s not clear that he has invited you to &#8220;reform&#8221; him; probably not, and his game consists on inviting people to help him only to withdraw and frustrate the helper’s intentions. You can consider this avoidance response and refusal to change as an attack on you… But because you’re so used to this type of interaction, you need his PA behavior to define your personal identity as being useful, thus you’ll get caught up in trying to manage him and manage yourself around his behaviors.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Now, his apparent ‘neediness’ will draw you into these situations, and then, as has become the norm, your own needs won’t be met, you will feel frustrated and follow one of two possible courses of action: either you’ll silently simmer and hope for things to change, or you will try to verbalize your anger in a way that will scare him and force him to promise to take action so that you get what you want… he will agree to it, only to have the opportunity to disappoint you again!</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">So what can you do?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">It is difficult to change a situation that has remained the same through all of your life, yet it is not impossible. Before you can come to terms with the relationship you currently have, it would be ideal for you to come to terms with the reason for it: the type of interaction you had (or still have with) your parent (who is the likeliest source of passive aggressive behavior in your life).</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">You might feel the need to talk to a coach, a good friend, or a spiritual adviser to admit the reality of the situation and gather the strength to confront it. Only once you have solved the issues stemming from your past and to which you are unconsciously holding on to, will you be able to successfully take on your present challenges.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">&nbsp;</p>
<div class="noraauthor" style="text-align: justify;"><img class="alignleft" src="/images/nora1.jpg" alt="Nora" />Nora Femenia is a well known coach, conflict solver and trainer, and CEO of Creative Conflict Resolutions, Inc. Visit her blog and signup free to be connected to her innovative conflict solutions, positive suggestions and life-changing coaching sessions, along with blog updates, news, and more! Get your <a href="http://conflictcoach.me/services/getstartednow/">conflict coach</a> session now!</div>
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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/prevent-passive-aggression-child/' rel='bookmark' title='Avoid Teaching Passive Aggression to Your Child'>Avoid Teaching Passive Aggression to Your Child</a> <small>Have you always wondered where your husband learned to be...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/break-silence-wall/' rel='bookmark' title='How to Break Through his Silence Wall'>How to Break Through his Silence Wall</a> <small>Understanding passive aggression is not as hard as it seems....</small></li>
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		<title>Having A Passive Aggressive Valentine? Go Figure!</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-valentine-figure/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-valentine-figure/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 09 Feb 2011 20:39:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[assertiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive definition]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive personality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[appreciation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[control]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[detachment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[disengaged feeling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional dependence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gift]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive resistance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[silence]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Everybody wants to have a happy Valentine’s Day with their loved one, and yet if you have marital problems, this seemingly simple aspiration seems to become a vast challenge, even a test. How could you have a good Valentine’s Day if your husband is often sulking and has a tendency to forget making plans or [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-valentine-figure/">Having A Passive Aggressive Valentine? Go Figure!</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: justify;">
<p style="text-align: justify;"><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/corazoncito1.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-738" title="corazoncito" src="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/corazoncito1-200x300.jpg" alt="" width="200" height="300" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">
<p style="text-align: justify;">Everybody wants to have a happy Valentine’s Day with their loved one, and yet if you have marital problems, this seemingly simple aspiration seems to become a vast challenge, even a test. How could you have a good Valentine’s Day if your husband is often sulking and has a tendency to forget making plans or get you a present for this particular day? You might even be ready for disappointment thinking that he will forget the day!</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">You can still enjoy the day, and I don’t mean that you should go and get a massage for yourself and then have some lonely chocolate (although that would be a nice and well-deserved treat). You can use this opportunity to be the one romancing your husband, and giving him a pleasant surprise, for men often complain about how they are the ones supposed to do all the work around this occasion.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">You can prepare his favorite meal or invite him to a restaurant. Make it a date and do not pressure him into being in charge. Tell him how nice and sharp he looks; remind him of the things you love about him and of one or two things he has done recently that you appreciate.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">You should be honest and affectionate with your comments, so that he feels recognized and appreciated. For the sake of the holiday and of the reasons why you are doing this (because you love your husband, because you want to have a good day, etc.) avoid criticizing him. Keep in mind that if you criticize him, he’ll feel attacked and will be likely to start deflecting blame via clamming up… do not let this happen because then you could start to get upset and if your temper gets the best of you, then an argument will ensue and two things will happen: one, that your husband will have “further proof” that you easily lose control and that it is you who is abusive, and two, that you will end up with exactly the bad memory of a Valentine’s day that you were seeking to avoid.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Remember that passive-aggressive people are not the most willing to apologize for their mistakes, so avoid this conundrum.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">It might seem like a lot to ask, but you could actually benefit from giving him a little something. Yes, a present. It does not have to be the newest, most expensive set of tools out in the market, but something simple and well thought-out. Here you are tapping into his desire to be recognized and the surprise value that it would have.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Now, here is the most challenging part of this proposal… after all the work that organizing a date can represent, and particularly if you have difficulties with managing confrontations&#8230; you should not expect anything in exchange for the date. Detach yourself from any expectation.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">I can hear you groaning&#8230;.Why this part of the recommendation is here? Don&#8217;t you deserve some appreciation also? Because in this way you are freeing him to be himself, not forced by a compulsory tit for tat behavior&#8230;So you are giving him a chance to relax and let his guard down, perhaps even talk to you more openly. Wouldn’t that be a better Valentine’s gift than a bunch of soon-to-wither flowers?</p>
<div class="noraauthor"><img class="alignleft" src="/images/nora1.jpg" alt="Nora" />Nora Femenia is a well known coach, conflict solver and trainer, and CEO of Creative Conflict Resolutions, Inc. Visit her blog and signup free to be connected to her innovative conflict solutions, positive suggestions and life-changing coaching sessions, along with blog updates, news, and more! Go now to <a href="http://conflictcoach.me">http://conflictcoach.me</a>.</div>
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		<title>How to react to the silent treatment?</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/react-silent-treatment/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/react-silent-treatment/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 25 Jan 2011 15:29:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[assertiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive personality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[assertion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blame]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cold shoulder]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[confusion]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive resistance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rejection]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[silence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[silent partner]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/?p=711</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Are you getting the cold shoulder from your partner, but you don’t know or understand why? Is he suddenly keeping your conversations at a minimum, giving you a little word here and there only to isolate himself? When this comes from your partner, from whom you expect a loving connection, this can be hurtful, frustrating, [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/react-silent-treatment/">How to react to the silent treatment?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Are you getting the cold shoulder from your partner, but you don’t know or understand why? Is he suddenly keeping your conversations at a minimum, giving you a little word here and there only to isolate himself? When this comes from your partner, from whom you expect a loving connection, this can be hurtful, frustrating, and confusing.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">This facet of passive aggressive behavior is difficult to deal with. When you’re sad, it can be tempting to say whatever you can think of until he talks to you again. When you’re hurt, you may just slam out of the room, leaving him to sulk in his own silence.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">What is the best course of action, in either case? What will effectively show him the consequences of the silent treatment, without making you stoop to his level or act out of anger?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Our recommended tactic is this: assert yourself. Remember that his silent treatment is a choice, that he could have behaved differently and didn’t. You are not under any obligation to give him what he wants or give in to his “punishment.” His treatment does not prove or confirm anything about your value; it simply shows that he can’t handle conflict.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Because you are not responsible for his behavior in any way, you can make your own decisions about how to react. If he decides to be distant, show him that you can do the same. Detach yourself (gracefully) by having your own projects and friends, beyond his influence. Not only will this allow you to have an environment away from him, it will allow you to think clearly, have a new perspective, and feel stronger the next time he tries to manipulate you with silence.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">When both of you have had your time alone, you will be better prepared to look at what happened and consider the impact his behavior is having on your relationship.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">
<div class="neilauthor"><div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div></p>
<div style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion.  You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today.</div>
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		<title>Stop confusing your brain!</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/stop-confusing-brain/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/stop-confusing-brain/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 21 Jan 2011 20:23:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive personality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[toxic relationship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blame]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cold shoulder]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[detachment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[disengaged feeling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hidden anger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[identity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive resistance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[unhappiness]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Being in an intimate relationship with a passive aggressive person creates a paradox – while you are together to create and encourage a romantic relationship, his passive aggression urges him to avoid intimacy and withdraw from connection. When he shuts down and turns away from you, it can feel as if you’re the only one [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/stop-confusing-brain/">Stop confusing your brain!</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: justify;">Being in an intimate relationship with a passive aggressive person creates a paradox – while you are together to create and encourage a romantic relationship, his passive aggression urges him to avoid intimacy and withdraw from connection.  When he shuts down and turns away from you, it can feel as if you’re the only one who really wants to be connected, and that there is no point on reaching out to him.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Today we’re offering a tip that will help you work through these feelings in a healthy way, so that you have a clearer understanding about the relationship.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">The real struggle we see in relationships like this is that the victim can’t identify what’s really going on. Maybe you see him pulling away and think “He doesn’t love me.” Or, even worst: &#8220;I&#8217;m not lovable.&#8221;  In reality, he is afraid of getting too close and then being hurt.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">This conflict within himself creates conflict between the two of you; he sends out contradicting messages like “I’ll be here for you when you need me,” and then he’s gone when you need his support in a project or event.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">He’ll produce even more confusion by trying to rationalize his behavior, giving you a list of good reasons why he does what he does.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Here’s the tactic most helpful for avoiding the confusion his actions can cause:</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Come to terms with being in a passive aggressive relationship. This has a lot to do with saying to yourself: &#8220;this is my situation, this is how it is. It is not about me, or him not loving me. It is about him, his passive aggression, and his hidden fears. My confusion and emotional pain are indicators of being with him – not him being with me!&#8221;</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">When you think clearly about the situation, you are better prepared to move forward toward a solution between yourselves.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Otherwise, you’ll keep accusing him of not wanting a relationship, he’ll accuse you of being too needy, and you’ll keep going around in circles!</p>
<div class="neilauthor">
<div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion.  You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Why don&#8217;t you get your conflict coaching session today? Go to <a href="http://www.Conflictcoach.me">Conflictcoach.me</a> now!.</div>
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		<title>Is he Frequently Sabotaging Your Projects?</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/sabotaging-projects/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/sabotaging-projects/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 28 Aug 2010 16:00:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive definition]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[When I feel that he is “Sabotaging My Projects,” the dream I’m yearning for is… unconditional support. Some of the responses, 75% of them expressed dreams so: 1. “I need to know that I have a partner who cares! When you truly love someone, you want what’s best for them; you want to see them [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/sabotaging-projects/">Is he Frequently Sabotaging Your Projects?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>When I feel that he is<br />
<strong>“Sabotaging My Projects,</strong>” the dream I’m yearning for is… unconditional support.</p>
<p>Some of the responses, 75% of them expressed dreams so:</p>
<p>1. “I need to know that I have a partner who cares! When you truly love someone, you want what’s best for them; you want to see them spread their wings and try to fly. Helping them with the things that matter to them is never a burden. Most importantly, loving someone means you wouldn’t dream of sabotaging their projects; their dreams. Unfortunately, that’s exactly what my husband has done, and almost all of my projects have been ruined by him.”</p>
<p>2. “More than anything, I desire the freedom and confidence to take on even the hardest projects. Instead of criticizing me or telling me I can’t do it, he should be cheering me on, letting me know that he’s proud of me. I know that I am strong enough to succeed without his help… But success would be so much more gratifying if I knew that he had been there to encourage me through my struggles.”</p>
<p>3. “I want to know that we don’t have to compete against one another and argue about whose project or needs are more ‘important’. I wish we could slow down, lean on each other more, and simply enjoy our time together. Who knows, maybe we would even get excited about each other’s important projects!”</p>
<p><strong>In what other ways would you know that he supports you?</strong></p>
<p>• “I know I can count on his support when I need it, no matter what it is I require.”</p>
<p>• “My husband cares enough to do something simply because he knows it’s important to me.”</p>
<p>•  “He is with me every step of the way, but he also respects my space and gives me time to develop my projects.”</p>
<p>• “It is a back and forth conversation: I give him my full support, and he returns the gesture.”</p>
<p>• “He takes a real, genuine interest in the things I want to do.”</p>
<p><strong>I simply need to feel respected.</strong></p>
<p>NOW that you deeply acknowledge this need to be respected, included and supported in your life struggles by the person most near you…how are you going to find the warm support you need to face everyday’s life challenges? How are you going to challenge his way of denying support to your projects, and request from him the reciprocal support that is the core of any marriage? And how are you going to repair the damage caused by his negativity and lack of support that forces you to give your battles always alone and with an extra handicap of fearing him stabbing you in the back? </p>
<div class="neilauthor"><div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion.  You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today. Begin now reading your copy of “<a href="http://www.passiveaggressivehusband.com/pa_husband/">The Art of Living with a Passive Aggressive Husband</a>” and recover your own happiness!</div>
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		<title>Balancing Passive Aggression Strategy 1</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/strategy1/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/strategy1/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 05 Jul 2010 17:57:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>norafem</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[control]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[Have you been sometimes daydreaming of giving your PA husband a spoonful of his own medicine? Are you really tired of balancing and compensating the day to day tasks he leaves undone? ever think of turning tables on him? This is the strategy called ‘fighting fire with fire.’ If your passive aggressive partner is used [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/strategy1/">Balancing Passive Aggression Strategy 1</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Have you been sometimes daydreaming of giving your PA husband a spoonful of his own medicine? Are you really tired of balancing and compensating the day to day tasks he leaves undone? ever think of turning tables on him? This is the strategy called ‘fighting fire with fire.’  </p>
<p>If your <a href="passiveaggresive.com">passive aggressive partner</a> is used to have you covering up for his withdrawal, silences and frequent claims of helplessness, then STOP.</p>
<p>You could train yourself on not reacting to cover up his missing activities. Given that your own welfare and livelihood are dependent on his, because living together, he is confident that you will save both of you at the last minute.</p>
<p>How could you pull this trick: </p>
<p>Declare somewhat casually that you are not to be automatically in charge of covering up what he leaves undone or forgets and that he needs to ask you for the favor of doing something in his own &#8220;to do list.&#8221; If there is no request from his side, inform him you will let the issue expire, drop or be disconnected.</p>
<p>Try to pick one issue not so fundamental to your own well being as the electricity supply. If this bill lapses because he didn’t remember to pay it, better you have your own flashlight hidden somewhere in the house.</p>
<p>Once you have selected your issue target, do nothing. Don’t remind him; don’t warn him; keep complete silence and see what happens.</p>
<p>Wait to mention the issue so he is the one first to recognize that something is not working. Wait to be asked if you did pay the bill, etc. then, look at him and say “That was in your list, and as we both are grown up people, we both need to take care of what needs to be done.”</p>
<p>Don’t offer to solve the problem; be prepared to live without, up until the moment he decides to go ahead and solve it. It can be difficult, but remember that you are making a point here.</p>
<p>Probably, the most difficult part of this strategy will be stopping yourself from helping, solving or taking care of things&#8230;This is a good thing to learn, so stay put, breathe deeply and remember to have fun and enjoy your own life.</p>
<p>PD. we have two more great strategies to teach you&#8230;.keep reading. If you have a good friend in need of learning them, could you send this message to them? Thanks!</p>
<div class="neilauthor"><div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div></p>
<div style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion.  You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today.</div>
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		<title>Is loving your PA husband wasted love?</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/loving-pa-husband-wasted-love/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/loving-pa-husband-wasted-love/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 08 Apr 2010 20:32:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>norafem</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[assertiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[attacks]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggression]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[After all those married years, one fine morning the view got projected into your vision, and you discovered the real name of this empty, cold and disappointing relationship. You understood that you have spent your married life in this barren state of mind that is a passive aggressive marriage. Lost are the initial illusions of [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/loving-pa-husband-wasted-love/">Is loving your PA husband wasted love?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>After all those married years, one fine morning the view got projected into your vision, and you discovered the real name of this empty, cold and disappointing relationship. You understood that you have spent your married life in this barren state of mind that is a passive aggressive marriage.</p>
<p>Lost are the initial illusions of intimacy, support and warmth. You had to learn to survive in a battle field of empty promises, cold shoulders and general loneliness. The abandonment scenario has been there all the time, it&#8217;s only now that you get to really see it&#8230;.</p>
<p>What are you going to do now? How can you reconcile this reality, the same you&#8217;ve been denying all these years, with your needs? And, even a deeper question pops up: how are you going to see your own history up until now, as one of wasted love or something else?</p>
<p>You are confronted now with a fork in the road. One side takes you to the usual path: deny the loneliness, the love starvation you have been up until now; the other fork of the road takes you in a new direction.</p>
<p>Are you going to begin to be true to yourself? Have you won the right to say your truth, no matter what happens? Stop walking on egg shells and say out loud: &#8220;this is too lonely for me, and I need something different?&#8221;</p>
<p>This point is really also a breakthrough for the marriage. If sometimes the spouse of a PA person puts up with a lot, and in the process developing a deep resentment never addressed, getting to the moment of truth frees you from this tacit contract.</p>
<p>You are not supposed to continue going along with the charade that his behavior is enough company, enough support, enough love. It&#8217;s the time to learn how not to be silent, how to be aggressive in the good sense, and begin asking for what you really need.</p>
<p>Being assertive means that you know your needs; know that what he gives you is not enough food four your heart and soul, and that you need this time a real satisfaction of your needs for connection, love and respect.</p>
<p>And the old way of yielding  to his sour mood in order to please him, to only keep the peace? it&#8217;s gone with the wind; you can&#8217;t sustain that pretense any longer. Your own integrity is demanding that now, for the first time, you have to put your own needs first&#8230;and follow through.</p>
<p>It doesn&#8217;t matter if he gets furious; it doesn&#8217;t matter if he goes into a hostile silence that lasts six weeks&#8230;your own integrity demands now that you&#8217;d be coherent with yourself. If there is something you need to do to procure more company, recognition, or support outside of the marriage, now is the moment of reaching out to your friends and family, and change your past response of accommodating to his passive aggression to one of self-assertion.</p>
<p>And, what happens with our basic question: was your love for him a wasted love? Of course not! it was only your own process of getting to love yourself first, which took some time to develop.</p>
<p>How come? Let&#8217;s see&#8230;.How often did you put up with his rejection, only to be able to continue believing that you were part of a couple? Your being accepting of his quirkiness, wasn&#8217;t it also your need not to be alone, and to avoid getting other person angry at you? </p>
<p>In life, the more we prostitute ourselves for acceptance, the less we are accepted; in comparison with the price you paid, there was never any real appreciation, any real acceptance. This is your lesson.</p>
<p>If and when you are back into the person you really are, you will see that the learnings are deep: from now on, you know what do you want in life; you are not afraid of expressing your needs, and you also know that, as you did your individual spiritual development,  he has to do his own process&#8230; </p>
<p>Who knows what is inside him and needs to be expressed, instead of his constant sulking? Whatever it is, now it is only his business&#8230;This is not your business any longer!</p>
<p>You did your best, and learned your lesson&#8230;Now, can you take the new, not the old road and see where it takes you to? It could be pretty educational, and also fun!</p>
<div class="noraauthor"><img class="alignleft" src="/images/nora1.jpg" alt="Nora" />Nora Femenia is a well known coach, conflict solver and trainer, and CEO of Creative Conflict Resolutions, Inc. Visit her blog and signup free to be connected to her innovative conflict solutions, positive suggestions and life-changing coaching sessions, along with blog updates, news, and more! Go now to http://www.creativeconflicts.com.</div>
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		<title>Passive aggression and home duties</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-home-duties/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-home-duties/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 12 Mar 2010 16:18:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive personality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[control]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional dependence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[expectations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hidden anger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[negotiation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive resistance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rejection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[resentment]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[In a normal marriage, there is always going on a healthy negotiation about shared tasks, sometimes described as “marital division of labor.” Both can agree in a simple conversation who is going to do what, taking into account the circumstances of each person, but also the need to have the tasks done. As an example, [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-home-duties/">Passive aggression and home duties</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In a normal marriage, there is always going on a healthy negotiation about shared tasks, sometimes described as “marital division of labor.” </p>
<p>Both can agree in a simple conversation who is going to do what, taking into account the circumstances of each person, but also the need to have the tasks done. </p>
<p>As an example, when both spouses are responsible for grocery shopping, they will have a system in place that guarantees there is food in the fridge and milk for Monday’s breakfast.</p>
<p>This ideal task distribution is what makes a marriage such a cooperative, nurturing experience. Both sides know that the other will comply with what needs to be done, so both can be secure and happy. In the case of any emergency, there are no buts, if or “I forgot” answers, but immediate response to the question: what do we need to do now? so things can go back to normal fast.</p>
<p>You are going to say: &#8220;This is the ideal cooperative marriage&#8230;only in the movies!&#8221; Very frequently there are obstacles to having an equal partnership, and one side feels like the other is giving orders, or commanding him to do house tasks when the conversation about chores pops up.</p>
<p>Usually for men not educated enough, talking about sharing house chores will be experienced as a threat to their masculinity. Wives expecting them to respond and answer to shared planning? No way! </p>
<p>They can respond with indignation and some open aggression…or they can feign to go along, say that they accept their shared responsibility, and then resort to passive aggressive mode.</p>
<p>What is passive aggression? Is a complex mix of perceptions and emotions that push a man into a resistant stance, whereby he sees himself as defending from a wife’s “intrusions” and having to protect himself from what he sees as “her control.”</p>
<p>Here, it’s useful to see that is this sustained reaction to holding up his share of the marriage duties is what causes most of the discussions and fights between the couple. </p>
<p>His interpretation of the wife as controlling avoids his taking up his share of responsibilities, and puts him in the role of a child hiding from the grown up’s expectations about him.</p>
<p>In order to resist, he could be doing behaviors like:</p>
<p>•	Eternally making excuses to avoid his obligations;<br />
•	Performing a task inefficiently that the spouse has to do it;<br />
•	Always “forgetting” what he promised to do;<br />
•	Using sarcasm describing his “controlling” wife.</p>
<p>In general, he can portray himself as the victim of marriage duties, using a permanent pessimistic mood, even when all is going well, and he is supposed to be happily married. </p>
<p>How can a wife deal with this character without feeling that she is constantly being sabotaged by him? </p>
<p>First, she needs to know this is a defense mechanism, learned along his earlier life experiences, and not exclusively directed against her. It’s the way he deals with life’s challenges….and can be observed in his work, in his other relationships and while dealing with his own projects. His “natural” answers are procrastination, denial, and forgetfulness.</p>
<p>Beyond knowing that passive aggressive behavior is his way of connecting, what else can she do? </p>
<p>Because there is a need to keep shared responsibilities taken care of, if she does everything, finally she will feel that she is married to no one. </p>
<p>The main question here for most of our readers is:  &#8220;Who is there to share the burden, if he &#8220;forgets&#8221; to be active and present in his own marriage?&#8221; </p>
<p>We think here that there are ways of negotiating a shared partnership with spouses. If we could learn creative ways of cancelling <a href="http://www.passiveaggresive.com">passive aggressive behavior</a> in the household front&#8230;life would be better, right?</p>
<div class="neilauthor"><div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div></p>
<div style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion.  You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today.</div>
<p><a rel="me" href="http://technorati.com/claim/kuidap8nzv"></a></div>
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		<title>Is Passive Aggression Sabotaging Your Proyects?</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-sabotaging-proyects/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-sabotaging-proyects/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 19 Jul 2009 18:12:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>norafem</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[angry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[confusion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[frustrated]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive resistance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[put downs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sabotaging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[unhappiness]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[How would you like to hear other peoples’ experiences? Perhaps I can invite you to peep over the shoulder, as this wife tells her own experience with a passive aggressive husband? “Once upon a time, I was a very patient, loving, confident, creative, happy, cheerful, accomplished woman and now I am angry, frustrated, unhappy, confused. [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-sabotaging-proyects/">Is Passive Aggression Sabotaging Your Proyects?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>How would you like to hear other peoples’ experiences? Perhaps I can invite you to peep over the shoulder, as this wife tells her own experience with a passive aggressive husband?</p>
<p><em>“Once upon a time, I was a very patient, loving, confident, creative, happy, cheerful, accomplished woman and now I am angry, frustrated, unhappy, confused. I always believed that my cheerful optimism would bring my husband up &#8211; he says it&#8217;s what attracted him, what he wanted to have and be&#8230;all he has done is to kill my spirit with passive resistance, punishing me and doing constant covert abuse (verbal, and  emotional). </p>
<p>He tries to control me (he has preferences about everything from my clothes to the brand of toilet paper I buy, expresses disapproval whenever I am happy doing my own thing &#8211; discouraged my career, my garden, my writing until I lost pleasure and passion and quit so he would stop making me feel bad like I am all about &#8220;fluff&#8221;&#8230;things that don&#8217;t matter. </p>
<p>My self-esteem is so low I just want to jump off the nearest bridge.” </em></p>
<p>As you&#8217;re sitting there in front of your computer reading this very personal letter, I can imagine you matching this frustrating marital experience to yours…and finding lots of points in common.</p>
<p>Perhaps you are focusing on this special point: </p>
<p><strong>“He is always irritated and shows his strongest disapproval whenever I am happy doing my own thing.”</strong></p>
<p>As you become aware of this aspect, perhaps the feelings well up in you: disappointment, loneliness, frustration at his lack of support. It’s not only that he doesn’t share your loves, the problem is that he can attack your projects immediately just because you love them!</p>
<p>Of course, you have gone through some advice on how to deal with passive aggressive husbands, and you know that you must not allow him to dictate everything that you should or not should do.</p>
<p>Before getting to that, perhaps you have the deep courage to look at the loneliness where his contempt leaves you. If you married with the normal hope of having a partner to do life affirming activities together, and to have fun together, his present sardonic resistance is leaving you alone, and frustrated and somehow angry at the deception. You need a companion that has fun at the same things you have fun at, so both can enjoy them. </p>
<p>If there is a need for him not to do things with you, because work commitments or other problems, perhaps you can accept that, and your trust is maintained.</p>
<p>What really is disconcerting and sad is his ability to destroy the things you love, so you are left without his company and without the activities you love to do and have fun at.</p>
<p>As you recognize now the impact that his attitude is having in reducing your world by destroying your capacity to enjoy doing some activities, think of the future. Who would you be in the next future if this behavior continues? A wife having such a “low self esteem that you would be ready to jump off the nearest bridge?”</p>
<p>Before you get to this point, you probably think that there is something you can do to protect your love of life….there are many things you can do to<a href="http://www.passiveaggresive.com"> <strong>recover your self</strong></a>. At this time, what is possible here is to tell you that you are right in your feelings of being abandoned by your husband not sharing now the same things that made him fell in love with you…and restricting or destroying your enjoyment of funny things to do. </p>
<p>It’s a difficult task, but while looking at the situation as it is, and not denying this impact on you, you are taking your first step to recovery.</p>
<p><a href="http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080806140957AAYXU8O">http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080806140957AAYXU8O</a></p>
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