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	<title>Passive Aggressive Husband &#187; Passive Aggressive Husband</title>
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		<title>The Passive Aggressive Dance</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-dance/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-dance/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 20 Jan 2012 20:20:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[assertiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[healthy happy relationship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Relationship Repair]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[appreciation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cold shoulder]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[detachment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[disengaged feeling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional needs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[human needs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hurt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[isolation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[silence]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/?p=1129</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[WE ARE STUCK IN THIS DANCE: HERS HIS I feel let down, isolated, and lonely. If I  confront you to get you to see what is hurting me and come back to me.. It Just Drives You Away, You became defensive and justify yourself. &#160; If I despair, you retreat even more Then I get [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-dance/">The Passive Aggressive Dance</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>
<p><strong><strong><strong>WE ARE STUCK IN THIS DANCE:</strong></strong></strong></p>
<div dir="ltr">
<div>
<table border="1">
<colgroup>
<col width="315" />
<col width="309" /> </colgroup>
<tbody>
<tr>
<td>
<p align="center">HERS</p>
</td>
<td>
<p align="center">HIS</p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<p align="center"><strong>I feel let down, isolated, and lonely.</strong></p>
<p align="center">If I  confront you to get you to see what<br />
is hurting me<br />
and come back to me..</p>
<p align="center"><strong>It Just Drives You Away,<br />
You became defensive and justify yourself.</strong></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p align="center">If I despair, you retreat even more<br />
Then I get more upset,<br />
desperate, and lonely&#8230;</p>
<p align="center"><strong>And I Lose My Faith in You</strong><br />
<strong>And In Our Marriage.</strong></p>
</td>
<td>
<p align="center">Looking at you being down gets me<br />
scared but you don’t keep silent,<br />
you tell me and your tale of hurt scares<br />
me even more&#8230;</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><strong>Did I Do That To You?</strong><br />
Really?</p>
<p align="center">Is better to see you angry with me<br />
than hurt I want to escape anyhow, or<br />
to show you how wrong you are,<br />
why don’t you see how I care?</p>
<p align="center">If I explain my reasons, it drives you mad&#8230;<br />
What can I offer you, but my logical reasons?</p>
<p align="center"><strong>I’m Terrified By<br />
The Fear of Losing You!</strong></p>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table>
</div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">What are we doing? We are repeating a performance where we hide our sore spots from each other:</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">You hurting and lonely, and me feeling like a kind of idiot&#8230;</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">I need, says her, to be able to ask for company and don’t feel rejected or ridiculed.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">I need, says him, to be able to use my usual responses in a way that you don’t label them as negative, so I feel accepted and can replace them with better others.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">He could say: &#8220;I know I have neglected you, worried about work issues. When I hear that you are sad and angry, I don’t know what to do and escape&#8230; and I have to deny my needs of being near you. If you give me a chance and stop evaluating my behavior, I can get together and appreciate your needs better.&#8221;</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">She could say: &#8220;I now know that when I panic and imagine that I’m left alone, is because it hurts so much remembering that my family left me alone too many times&#8230; If I give you a chance, and don’t compare you with them, probably then you can get near me without conflict? Because I really need your attention!&#8221;</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">What are they doing? The exchanges you see above demonstrate what we call the basic passive aggressive dance. Each person “dances” around in a passive aggressive way because neither really knows how to get what they want from the other. (Of course, without asking for it: this is the passive aggressive piece of the behavior)</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">What is needed is a different kind of conversation, where we can invite the parties to acknowledge their basic needs&#8230;. She has to say how lonely she is, he has to say how terrified he is of losing her, and how impotent both are of  fulfilling simple needs, because they are so wrapped up in their own perception that they can’t see the other’s perspective.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">The dance finishes when both sides can acknowledge the other side’s basic human needs&#8230;. and accept that the marriage deal is exactly that: I will take care of identifying and solving your needs&#8230; and you will do the same for me.</p>
</div>
<div class="noraauthor"><img class="alignleft" src="/images/nora1.jpg" alt="Nora" /><span>Nora Femenia is a well known coach, conflict solver and trainer, and CEO of Creative Conflict Resolutions, Inc. Visit her blog and signup free to be connected to her innovative conflict solutions, positive suggestions and life-changing coaching sessions, along with blog updates, news, and more! Go now to <a class="smarterwiki-linkify" href="http://www.creativeconflicts.com">http://www.creativeconflicts.com</a>.</span></div>
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		<title>Wishing you a wonderful Holidays season!</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/wishing-wonderful-holidays-season/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/wishing-wonderful-holidays-season/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 22 Dec 2011 21:27:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[assertiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Relationship Repair]]></category>

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		<item>
		<title>Why Passive Aggressive Men are so Attractive?</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-people-attractive/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-people-attractive/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 21 Nov 2011 17:59:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[assertiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[toxic relationship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[attraction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[healing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-esteem]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[toxic attraction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wounds]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/?p=1082</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Quite often, we’ll have comments from clients wondering how they could have been so blind to their spouse’s passive aggression and the toxic feelings they create. Some wives admit that they went back to their husbands multiple times, acquiescing to what the husbands wanted, without really knowing why they took the risk of being hurt [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-people-attractive/">Why Passive Aggressive Men are so Attractive?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

Related posts:<ol>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-husband-denial/' rel='bookmark' title='Is Your Passive Aggressive Husband in Denial?'>Is Your Passive Aggressive Husband in Denial?</a> <small>Some of the hardest tasks in healing the passive aggressive...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/divorce-child-marry-husband/' rel='bookmark' title='Divorce the Child, Marry the Husband'>Divorce the Child, Marry the Husband</a> <small>You have seen it all: The cold shoulder. The hidden...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-kills-communication/' rel='bookmark' title='How Does Passive Aggression Kill Communication?'>How Does Passive Aggression Kill Communication?</a> <small>How does passive aggression kill the communication and love in...</small></li>
</ol>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Quite often, we’ll have comments from clients wondering how they could have been so blind to their spouse’s passive aggression and the toxic feelings they create. Some wives admit that they went back to their husbands multiple times, acquiescing to what the husbands wanted, without really knowing why they took the risk of being hurt again.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">What is it about a passive aggressive person that is attractive to us? Well, one reason is that we seek out relationships that are familiar to us. We may not seek out spouses that are carbon copies of our parents, but we will seek out people who mirror the behaviors we’re already used to seeing in our past. What this means is that you have chosen your passive aggressive spouse because your parent (or guardian) expressed similar behavior. If this is the case, you may be able to look back and see traces of passive aggression in other people you’ve dated, as well.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Beyond our past telling us who to pick, there are also certain needs that a passive aggressive person can fulfill for some people. Strange to think, right? However, for some people, the passive aggressive person’s wounds and issues help build one’s self-esteem, make them feel like they have power, or fill a need to care and nurse someone in need. Sometimes, putting all our attention on someone else’s problems can give us a break from dealing with our own. Can you see the danger in that? In devoting yourself to ignoring your problems, with only get worse as your spouse treats you with less and less respect? Suddenly, the shock many women feel when they break with their passive aggressive spouse makes sense &#8211; the personal issues that went unaddressed for years are now looming on the horizon, making it seem impossible to be independent and healthy anymore.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Making the decision to take care of yourself and reevaluate what YOU need can be the biggest thing you can do for yourself in a passive aggressive relationship. By focusing on taking care of yourself, healing your OWN wounds and moving forward, you can begin giving yourself the strength and confidence you need to work through your relationship, and perhaps be the role model your husband needs.</p>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">Do you need help refocusing and learning how to heal your own needs and wounds? You can talk to one of our Conflict Coaches today, and receive a <a href="http://conflictcoach.me/services">free coaching session</a>.</div>
<div class="neilauthor">
<div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion. You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today.We can begin by you having a complimentary consultation with <a title="Get Started Now!" href="http://conflictcoach.me/services/getstartednow/" rel="nofollow">Conflict Coach</a>, with a plan for action to change your life with new skills included. Just click this link and get started now!</div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
</div>
<div id="crp_related"><h3>Related Posts:</h3><ul><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/relationship-repair/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Does Your Relationship Need Repair?</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/rescuing-life-long-pa-marriage/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">How to recover your life after a passive aggressive marriage?</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/husbands-lose-dont-stop-passive-aggression/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Husbands: What Will You Lose If You Don’t Stop Your Passive Aggression?</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/improving-potential-happiness-marriage/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">How can you love your Passive Aggressive Husband?</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-2/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">The Three C&#8217;s of Passive Aggression</a></li></ul></div><p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-people-attractive/">Why Passive Aggressive Men are so Attractive?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>
<p>Related posts:<ol>
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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/divorce-child-marry-husband/' rel='bookmark' title='Divorce the Child, Marry the Husband'>Divorce the Child, Marry the Husband</a> <small>You have seen it all: The cold shoulder. The hidden...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-kills-communication/' rel='bookmark' title='How Does Passive Aggression Kill Communication?'>How Does Passive Aggression Kill Communication?</a> <small>How does passive aggression kill the communication and love in...</small></li>
</ol></p>
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		<item>
		<title>How can you love your Passive Aggressive Husband?</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/improving-potential-happiness-marriage/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/improving-potential-happiness-marriage/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 18 Nov 2011 17:56:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[assertiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive personality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[appreciation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bonding]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[connection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[how to love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loving]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[reconnecting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[renewal]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/?p=1084</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[What are some things you can do to improve the atmosphere in your marriage? What are the little things that count when trying to seek happiness between the two of you? Here are some ideas for what you can do. Remember why you’re still here: In a PA relationship, it can be extremely hard to [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/improving-potential-happiness-marriage/">How can you love your Passive Aggressive Husband?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/divorce-child-marry-husband/' rel='bookmark' title='Divorce the Child, Marry the Husband'>Divorce the Child, Marry the Husband</a> <small>You have seen it all: The cold shoulder. The hidden...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-husband-denial/' rel='bookmark' title='Is Your Passive Aggressive Husband in Denial?'>Is Your Passive Aggressive Husband in Denial?</a> <small>Some of the hardest tasks in healing the passive aggressive...</small></li>
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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>
<p style="text-align: justify;">What are some things you can do to improve the atmosphere in your marriage? What are the little things that count when trying to seek happiness between the two of you? Here are some ideas for what you can do.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;"><strong>Remember why you’re still here:</strong> In a PA relationship, it can be extremely hard to remember why you’re sticking it out and staying with your husband. You need to remind yourself of his good qualities (the things he does right rather than the things he does wrong). Try this: every day, write down two or three things that he’s done lately that you appreciate, or qualities you love about him, or memories that make you happy. It can help boost your perception of him and bring positive energy back into your interactions. When he’s trying to use PA behavior with you, these positive things will help you focus on using your own techniques, instead of breaking down.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;"><strong>Show him you still care:</strong> Valentine’s Day isn’t the only day that we need to show our spouses some love. Reading our blog has hopefully taught you the wounds and fears underlying your husband’s use of PA behaviors. Sometimes, what works best to counteract his behavior is to simply show him that he doesn’t need to fear your rejection. You can write him little notes by the coffee maker, or greet him warmly at the door, or even play with him and tickle him like you do with the kids. These are the kinds of things that make you feel refreshed and positive (you&#8217;re focusing on loving him instead of fighting him) while also soothing the voice inside him that&#8217;s asking, “Does she still want me?”</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;"><strong>Ask for feedback:</strong> This one might be hard for you, and you may want to practice doing the others first. But it can be extremely beneficial for both of you, as a sort of icebreaker, to simply ask your husband how he feels about your treatment of him. Ask him, “How do you know that I love you?” or “Did I make you feel that I didn’t love when I said that?” These questions may sound like something you’d ask your child when he or she is upset, but guess what? It works the same way. It helps both of you to understand each other’s communication and perceptions better, while the simple questions offer a less confrontational outlet for your husband’s true feelings.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">You can get more tips for improving your marital happiness by talking one-on-one with our <a href="http://conflictcoach.me/services">Conflict Coach</a>.</p>
</div>
<div class="neilauthor">
<div class="mceTemp" style="text-align: justify;">
<dl id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px;">
<dt class="wp-caption-dt"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /></dt>
<dd class="wp-caption-dd">Neil Warner</dd>
</dl>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion. You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today.We can begin by you having a complimentary consultation with <a title="Get Started Now!" href="http://conflictcoach.me/services/getstartednow/" rel="nofollow">Conflict Coach</a>, with a plan for action to change your life with new skills included. Just click this link and get started now!</div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
</div>
<div id="crp_related"><h3>Related Posts:</h3><ul><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-2/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">The Three C&#8217;s of Passive Aggression</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/repair-work-in-a-marriage-easy-to-do/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Repair work in a marriage is easy!</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/relationship-repair/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Does Your Relationship Need Repair?</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/women-passive-aggressive-test/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Women like you are taking the passive aggressive test: you are not alone!</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-attachment/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Passive Aggressive Attachment</a></li></ul></div><p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/improving-potential-happiness-marriage/">How can you love your Passive Aggressive Husband?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>
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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/divorce-child-marry-husband/' rel='bookmark' title='Divorce the Child, Marry the Husband'>Divorce the Child, Marry the Husband</a> <small>You have seen it all: The cold shoulder. The hidden...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-husband-denial/' rel='bookmark' title='Is Your Passive Aggressive Husband in Denial?'>Is Your Passive Aggressive Husband in Denial?</a> <small>Some of the hardest tasks in healing the passive aggressive...</small></li>
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		<title>How to recover your life after a passive aggressive marriage?</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/rescuing-life-long-pa-marriage/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/rescuing-life-long-pa-marriage/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 04 Nov 2011 15:12:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[assertiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[advice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[coaching]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[detachment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[recovery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-esteem]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-recovery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[strategies]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/?p=1076</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[When readers of this blog accept our standing invitation to have a free coaching session, they bring their own stories. Some of them are easier to hear and offer support to; others are heart wrenching. Which stories are the saddest? The ones that present a woman past her fifties, who has spent most of her [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/rescuing-life-long-pa-marriage/">How to recover your life after a passive aggressive marriage?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/repair-work-in-a-marriage-easy-to-do/' rel='bookmark' title='Repair work in a marriage is easy!'>Repair work in a marriage is easy!</a> <small>In some situations, when coaching is really the necessary tool...</small></li>
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</ol>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div style="text-align: justify;">When readers of this blog accept our standing invitation to have a free coaching session, they bring their own stories. Some of them are easier to hear and offer support to; others are heart wrenching.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">Which stories are the saddest? The ones that present a woman past her fifties, who has spent most of her married life waiting for the husband to finally change and connect with her in a significant way. Only now are these women discovering certain basic ideas offered here:</div>
<div>
<ul>
<li style="text-align: justify;">Passive aggression is learned in childhood;</li>
<li>Is a defensive style focusing on how to keep other people away;</li>
<li>There is little they can do to change the man they are living with, he must change himself.</li>
</ul>
<p style="text-align: justify;">After learning these concepts, the perspective of getting old in an empty marriage sets in. It is a moment of truth, where they see their past as gone, their present as painful, and the prospect of their future as filled with the same loneliness.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">What can we offer in that situation? What is there to be done? Detach and take care of yourself. This time, the lesson is even more urgent.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Because they have serious deficits, because living your whole life in emotional misery leaves you empty and sad, and angry, the first task is to detach completely of the relationship. Begin to see yourself as worthy of attention, come up with a list of your own unattended needs and do for yourself what you have been waiting him to do all these years. Only then will you be strong enough to work on saving the marriage (if that’s what you still really want).</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Fortunately, once you look at your emotional needs, you can see that there are multiple ways of fulfilling the voids. We can begin to offer some ideas, which you can pick from to begin.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;"><strong>Strategies for Self-Care and Recovery:</strong></p>
<p>Make a plan to recover your self-esteem:<br />
Appreciate your resilience up until this time, celebrate yourself and your strength.<br />
Visit and/or work with people and places where you feel appreciated and well received.<br />
Respect your life routine and add extra pleasurable tasks.<br />
Take care of yourself: eat well, do your exercise routine and sleep well.<br />
Have a plan to restore calm and stay self-centered with meditation, yoga or t’ai chi.<br />
Afford yourself meditative walks in nature (or extra time in the garden).<br />
Accept all your feelings and find confidants to share them with.<br />
Place around the house positive images to see when you are feeling lost or sad.<br />
Avoid self-judgements about your “guilt.”<br />
Approve yourself and your decisions every day.<br />
Do something special for yourself every day.<br />
Acknowledge your own accomplishments.<br />
Connect with others using reflective listening.<br />
Learn the meaning of your marital experience lessons, and move on.</p>
<p>For more tips about detachment and what it means, see our other posts:<br />
<a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/detach-passive-aggression-kindly/?isalt=0">Detach from Passive Aggression, Kindly!</a><br />
<a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/detach-passive-aggressive-husband/?isalt=0">How do I detach from a passive aggressive husband?</a></p>
<p>You can also contact one of our coaches for a <a href="http://conflictcoach.me/get-help/i-feel-so-empty/">free coaching session</a>, where you&#8217;ll receive private, one on one advice about your personal situation and the struggles you&#8217;re having with detachment and positivity. Call us today!</p>
</div>
<div class="neilauthor">
<div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion. You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today.We can begin by you having a complimentary consultation with <a title="Get Started Now!" href="http://conflictcoach.me/services/getstartednow/" rel="nofollow">Conflict Coach</a>, with a plan for action to change your life with new skills included. Just click this link and get started now!</div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
</div>
<div id="crp_related"><h3>Related Posts:</h3><ul><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggressive-people-attractive/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Why Passive Aggressive Men are so Attractive?</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/relationship-repair/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Does Your Relationship Need Repair?</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-2/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">The Three C&#8217;s of Passive Aggression</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/repair-work-in-a-marriage-easy-to-do/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Repair work in a marriage is easy!</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/women-passive-aggressive-test/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Women like you are taking the passive aggressive test: you are not alone!</a></li></ul></div><p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/rescuing-life-long-pa-marriage/">How to recover your life after a passive aggressive marriage?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>
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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/stop-passive-aggression-hurting-life/' rel='bookmark' title='Stop Passive Aggression From Hurting Your Life!'>Stop Passive Aggression From Hurting Your Life!</a> <small>It can take passive aggressive people years, even lifetimes, to...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/repair-work-in-a-marriage-easy-to-do/' rel='bookmark' title='Repair work in a marriage is easy!'>Repair work in a marriage is easy!</a> <small>In some situations, when coaching is really the necessary tool...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/silence-hurt-marriage/' rel='bookmark' title='His Silence Can Hurt Your Marriage!'>His Silence Can Hurt Your Marriage!</a> <small>When you have a fight with your spouse, you can...</small></li>
</ol></p>
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		<item>
		<title>If you don&#8217;t show your emotions, will he talk?</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/show-emotions-talk/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/show-emotions-talk/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 21 Oct 2011 16:34:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional dependence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[frustrated]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[isolation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[photo credit: ValetheKid Some of the most damaging interactions between a PA husband and his wife go like this conflict escalation: She wants a moment of intimacy, so she shares all her feelings (no filter here); She expects husband to do the same; He doesn’t know how, he stays silent; The more she gets frustrated [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/show-emotions-talk/">If you don&#8217;t show your emotions, will he talk?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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<p id="internal-source-marker_0.26387469144538045" style="text-align: center;" dir="ltr"><a title="down" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/21875079@N00/43656306/" target="_blank"><img src="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/26/43656306_00c9d9e14e_m.jpg" alt="down" border="0" /></a><br />
<small><a title="Attribution-NoDerivs License" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/2.0/" target="_blank"><img src="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/wp-content/plugins/photo-dropper/images/cc.png" alt="Creative Commons License" width="16" height="16" align="absmiddle" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://www.photodropper.com/photos/" target="_blank">photo</a> credit: <a title="ValetheKid" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/21875079@N00/43656306/" target="_blank">ValetheKid</a></small></p>
<p dir="ltr">Some of the most damaging interactions between a PA husband and his wife go like this conflict escalation:</p>
<ul>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">She wants a moment of intimacy, so she shares all her feelings (no filter here);</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">She expects husband to do the same;</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">He doesn’t know how, he stays silent;</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">The more she gets frustrated and hurt, she escalates her emotional demands;</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">He only gives back more stonewalling and resentment; or leaves the room.</p>
</li>
</ul>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">If this is what you’re used to dealing with in your marriage, you’re probably asking yourself, “Should I just stay quiet? What’s the point in sharing my needs? Does it help or hurt us, in the end?”</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">A reader recently told us: “When he deflects my efforts to connect with him and he withdraws rather than sharing, what happens next is maddening silence. As a result, I feel criticized, rejected and dismissed.”</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">Some men find it so upsetting, so emotionally stimulating to listen to their partners &#8220;rant&#8221; that they feel they have only two choices: either to ventilate their anger or withdraw. In fact, this is supported by the research that shows that their pulse-rates escalate during conflict and they find this unbearable. As a result of their own escalating emotion &#8212; which they can&#8217;t tolerate &#8212; they either try to get her to shut up &#8212; or they leave the room. She feels controlled, marginalized and abandoned.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">This situation is made up of a lethal combination of “over-sharing” (on the wife’s side) and clamming up (on his side).</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">When is the right time to use emotional restraint? As hard as it may seem to do, in this situation, it is better not to wear your feelings of anxiety, loss and despair on your sleeve (and ironically, when you don’t, you don’t feel as rejected and dismissed). This is the only thing that will interrupt the vicious cycle of you approaching and him retreating. Doing what you always do (express your rush of feelings and hope he feels pity) will no longer work if your husband is even slightly a passive aggressive man.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">What is important here is to work on training your response to his behavior &#8211; this often works better than doing the same things you’ve always done and trying to change him. You can pick one idea from this list now:</p>
<ul style="text-align: justify;">
<li>
<p dir="ltr">Train yourself on calming techniques (meditation, yoga, 5-5-5 breathing)</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">Educating yourself on emotional management</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">Ask yourself questions like, “Is what I’m feeling true?” If it is, “Do I need to share it now, or can I wait?”</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">Take a walk</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">Pray</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">Chat with the dog/cat (or just cuddle with them)</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">Take the kids out to do something fun</p>
</li>
</ul>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">We know. In Western culture, we&#8217;re not used to being asked to keep our emotions to ourselves (we call it &#8220;hiding&#8221; them). But we&#8217;re not telling you to never share feelings &#8211; rather, encouraging you to take the time to think about how the sheer display of your emotions makes him feel. Usually, you&#8217;re only thinking about the way his emotions make you feel, right?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">We call your normal way of interacting with your husband a &#8220;fishing expedition.&#8221; You fish around for the answers and feelings you want from him, and because he doesn&#8217;t know how to provide them, he feels he has no resource but to clam up. Now comes to critical question: do you keep the same fishing tactics? Or do you change your lure, let him come to you?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">This analogy is a bit generalized, of course, but you get the idea. Emotions are part of this interaction between the two of you, so whatever you express has consequences. That is why the best way of not triggering his passive aggression (or your frustration with it) is to get to know and manage your own emotions.</p>
<ul style="text-align: justify;">
<li>
<p dir="ltr">You can ask yourself what is your part on creating his silence (&#8220;What did I do that made him angry just now? Ah, he is scared of my emotional explosion!&#8221; This allows you to manage your own side of the interaction)</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">Perhaps even you could decide to stay in silence yourself for a little while, and see what happens</p>
</li>
<li>
<p dir="ltr">Or you can wait, do something else, give space, time and respect and see if there is a different response. Nobody wants to open up under such pressure.</p>
</li>
</ul>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">We&#8217;re not saying that his behavior is your fault. There is nothing wrong with emotion or sharing it. But being in a passive aggressive marriage (and being committed to healing it) means you have to change your game a little. Even if he would be annoying and abrasive, you still have the right to choose to be affected or ignore him, and that&#8217;s extremely important to remember: you are still in control of your own life and emotions.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">When you are the owner of your emotions and know when and how to react, then the message to your husband will be more direct, clear and productive. If you stop attributing all your distress to what he does, and learn how to separate your own peace of mind from what he does, you will feel better and he will be willing to get near and share with you. Forcing him to share everything with you is overbearing and imposing, and produces the opposite result.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">Learning techniques to help you stay calm will ensure that you can still enjoy the good parts of your life now. You will be in control of your own peace of mind; and of your own happiness. You can plan for the future. Being in better control of your emotions and creating a loving space of respect between the two will help you both to catch a breath and get the situation under control and in a more positive vibe.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">Do you need help finding ways to stay calm in the face of passive aggression? Our Conflict Coaches are standing by to help with just those sort of issues. You learn what to say when, how to understand his actions and responses, and much more. Visit <a href="http://conflictcoach.me/services">Conflict Coach</a> today and schedule your own coaching session, so you can change your life.</p>
</div>
<div class="neilauthor">
<div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion. You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today.We can begin by you having a complimentary consultation with <a title="Get Started Now!" href="http://conflictcoach.me/services/getstartednow/" rel="nofollow">Conflict Coach</a>, with a plan for action to change your life with new skills included. Just click this link and get started now!</div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
</div>
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		<title>80% of Men Feel They Have No Responsibility to Be Open With Loved Ones</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/80-men-feel-responsibility-open-loved/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/80-men-feel-responsibility-open-loved/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 06 Oct 2011 15:00:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[emotional needs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[how to deal with a passive aggressive man]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[80% of men prefer to “clam up” and not share their personal thoughts with loved ones, in order to avoid feeling vulnerable, rejected or criticized. This is according to a survey recently conducted by Creative Conflict Resolutions. Creative Conflict Resolutions tested more than 900 men by using an online questionnaire, in order to determine the [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/80-men-feel-responsibility-open-loved/">80% of Men Feel They Have No Responsibility to Be Open With Loved Ones</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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<p id="internal-source-marker_0.7063754852861166" dir="ltr">80% of men prefer to “clam up” and not share their personal thoughts with loved ones, in order to avoid feeling vulnerable, rejected or criticized. This is according to a survey recently conducted by Creative Conflict Resolutions.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Creative Conflict Resolutions tested more than 900 men by using an online questionnaire, in order to determine the presence of passive aggressive behavior in each test-taker. This test has twenty-one questions about the way people approach communication and emotional issues in their relationship, and it is still available for free at their site, <a href="http://passiveaggressivetest.com/passive-aggressive-test/">Passive Aggressive Test</a>.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Their findings show that among passive aggressive men, and sometimes even with otherwise emotionally healthy men, there is an insistent urge to hide true feelings and opinions.</p>
<p dir="ltr">This leads to the confusing situation that many couples face during a passive aggressive relationship. The passive aggressive person makes promises, agrees, and otherwise goes along with his partner to avoid feeling vulnerable &#8211; but then doesn’t deliver, because they never really meant to. Their partners feel frustrated by this contradictory behavior, and confront the promise-breaker with this fateful message: “I think you might be passive aggressive.”</p>
<p dir="ltr">The result? A vicious cycle where the passive aggressive person retreats more, clams up more, trying to fly under their partner’s emotional needs radar. It turns into a situation of extreme isolation and growing lack of trust, which can end the marriage.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Another interesting statistic? 68% of the men tested said they found some satisfaction in being called out; they felt that had gotten “revenge” by breaking a promise to someone who deserved to be let down. Why the revenge? This is the core of the Creative Conflicts proposal: to find the heart of the passive aggressive person’s hurt, which prompts him to take revenge against people who are only looking for a deeper connection.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Creative Conflicts wants to share this information with both the passive aggressive man and his partner, addressing both the causes and the effects of passive aggressive behavior. “The partner of a passive aggressive person can spend the best 20-30 years of their life trying to decode this maddening double message, all while being accused of thinking crazy thoughts and be overly needy when the subject is brought up.</p>
<p dir="ltr">After analyzing the results and the implications thereof, Creative Conflicts created a new set of tools for the passive aggressive husband, to complement the tools they already offer for his unsuspecting partner. With their survey, Creative Conflicts gained greater perspective on the mindset of the passive aggressive man and where his emotional needs lie. Their tools outline the path and steps a passive aggressive man needs to take in order to heal his emotional disconnection and his sending double messages. Creative Conflicts’ new system is ready for their clients, and has already met with success. It can be found at <a href="http://passiveaggressivetest.com/StopPANow">Passive Aggressive System</a>.</p>
<p dir="ltr">
</div>
<div class="neilauthor">
<div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion. You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today.We can begin by you having a complimentary consultation with <a title="Get Started Now!" href="http://conflictcoach.me/services/getstartednow/" rel="nofollow">Conflict Coach</a>, with a plan for action to change your life with new skills included. Just click this link and get started now!</div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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		<title>68% of Men Prefer to Retreat and Say &#8220;Yes&#8221; To Avoid Fighting</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/68-men-prefer-retreat-avoid-fighting/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/68-men-prefer-retreat-avoid-fighting/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 03 Oct 2011 15:00:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[More than 68% of men prefer to say “yes” and back down to avoid confrontation, according to a survey recently conducted by Creative Conflict Resolutions. Creative Conflict Resolutions tested more than 900 men by using an online questionnaire, in order to determine the presence of passive aggressive behavior in each test-taker. This test has twenty-one [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/68-men-prefer-retreat-avoid-fighting/">68% of Men Prefer to Retreat and Say &#8220;Yes&#8221; To Avoid Fighting</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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<p id="internal-source-marker_0.7063754852861166" style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">More than 68% of men prefer to say “yes” and back down to avoid confrontation, according to a survey recently conducted by Creative Conflict Resolutions.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">Creative Conflict Resolutions tested more than 900 men by using an online questionnaire, in order to determine the presence of passive aggressive behavior in each test-taker. This test has twenty-one questions about the way people approach communication and conflict in their relationship, and it is still available for free at their site, <a href="http://passiveaggressivetest.com/passive-aggressive-test/">Passive Aggressive Test</a>.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">Using their findings, Creative Conflicts began to construct a map of the game of life, according to the passive aggressive mindset. The mindset demands “going along” with others by pretending to accept their requests and needs. In this way, the basic incompetence of the passive aggressive person to feel empathy is successfully masked. Essentially, what is produced is a “make believe role play,” where the passive aggressive person feels they are required to mask their own feelings and play a part in order to receive any sort of love.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">Creative Conflicts wants those findings to be shared with the thousands of couples struggling with passive aggression. The partner of a passive aggressive person can spend the best 20-30 years of their life trying to decode this maddening double message. Meanwhile, in trying to decode it, the innocent partner can be accused of being crazy, aggressive and overly demanding.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">This reveals why Creative Conflicts used their results in the way that they did: they created a new set of tools for the passive aggressive husband. With their survey, Creative Conflicts gained greater perspective on the mindset of the passive aggressive man and where his emotional needs lie. To change this situation, the system Creative Conflicts has created offers a road map that helps the passive aggressive person own his lack of empathy and the need to fake commitment, exchanging them for real emotional bonding. Creative Conflicts’ new system is ready for their clients, and has already met with success. It can be found at <a href="http://passiveaggressivetest.com/StopPANow">Passive Aggressive System</a>.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;" dir="ltr">
</div>
<div class="neilauthor">
<div class="mceTemp" style="text-align: justify;">
<dl id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px;">
<dt class="wp-caption-dt"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /></dt>
<dd class="wp-caption-dd">Neil Warner</dd>
</dl>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult angry relationship with love and compassion. You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today.We can begin by you having a complimentary consultation with <a title="Get Started Now!" href="http://conflictcoach.me/services/getstartednow/" rel="nofollow">Conflict Coach</a>, with a plan for action to change your life with new skills included. Just click this link and get started now!</div>
<p style="text-align: justify;">
</div>
<div id="crp_related"><h3>Related Posts:</h3><ul><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/80-men-feel-responsibility-open-loved/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">80% of Men Feel They Have No Responsibility to Be Open With Loved Ones</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/women-passive-aggressive-test/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Women like you are taking the passive aggressive test: you are not alone!</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/system-husbands-passive-aggression/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">New System to End Your Husband&#8217;s Passive Aggression!</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/husbands-lose-dont-stop-passive-aggression/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Husbands: What Will You Lose If You Don’t Stop Your Passive Aggression?</a></li><li><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-means-fight-connect/" rel="bookmark" class="crp_title">Passive Aggression Means We Can’t Fight to Connect</a></li></ul></div><p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/68-men-prefer-retreat-avoid-fighting/">68% of Men Prefer to Retreat and Say &#8220;Yes&#8221; To Avoid Fighting</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>
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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/system-husbands-passive-aggression/' rel='bookmark' title='New System to End Your Husband&#8217;s Passive Aggression!'>New System to End Your Husband&#8217;s Passive Aggression!</a> <small>We know you’ve been reading frantically reading our articles for...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/prevent-passive-aggression-child/' rel='bookmark' title='Avoid Teaching Passive Aggression to Your Child'>Avoid Teaching Passive Aggression to Your Child</a> <small>Have you always wondered where your husband learned to be...</small></li>
</ol></p>
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		<title>Women like you are taking the passive aggressive test: you are not alone!</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/women-passive-aggressive-test/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/women-passive-aggressive-test/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 Sep 2011 02:44:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[assertiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive definition]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive personality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[toxic relationship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blame]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[confusion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[control]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[detachment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional abuse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[isolation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[security]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[silent partner]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/?p=1040</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[While you were thinking that you were doing this &#8220;test taking&#8221; by yourself, hiding under a fake male name, or your initials, You were not alone! It was really surprising for us to begin receiving letters from the wives, just telling about their experience taking the test! Yes, they are taking the test in place [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/women-passive-aggressive-test/">Women like you are taking the passive aggressive test: you are not alone!</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

Related posts:<ol>
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<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/conflict-coach-offers-test-passive-aggressive-husbands/' rel='bookmark' title='New Test for Passive Aggressive Husbands'>New Test for Passive Aggressive Husbands</a> <small>Conflict Coach presents a new, effective way for men to...</small></li>
<li><a href='http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/passive-aggression-kills-communication/' rel='bookmark' title='How Does Passive Aggression Kill Communication?'>How Does Passive Aggression Kill Communication?</a> <small>How does passive aggression kill the communication and love in...</small></li>
</ol>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: justify;">While you were thinking that you were doing this &#8220;test taking&#8221; by yourself, hiding under a fake male name, or your initials, You were not alone!</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">It was really surprising for us to begin receiving letters from the wives, just telling about their experience taking the test! Yes, they are taking the test in place of their husbands&#8230;using his very frequent responses she can play the game of being him for the test and finish it. And receive the answer&#8230;</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Why are they doing this? Because they need answers! What we find now is that receiving this answer can be very liberating&#8230;today, some wife wrote about:<strong>“My epiphany day!”</strong> Hear her words:</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;"><em>&#8220;Actually, I just did the test, in the way that i see my husband. Been married nearly 38 years. I&#8217;ve been reading on your site, and what a HUGE revelation. I&#8217;ve always seen him as passive aggressive, even though i really didn&#8217;t know the definitive meaning of that word; but just the sounds of it, fits him. </em></p>
<p style="text-align: justify;"><em>I&#8217;ve always seen him as Mr. sabotager; did a lot of reading today..OMG&#8230;it hasn&#8217;t been my imagination; it explains almost everything. In so many ways, I have seen that I married a man who is still emotionally a child.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: justify;"><em>But I have figured out enough, finally, that this is not because of me; this is his problem; I was always told that everything is my problem and that I&#8217;m ungrateful&#8230;on and on the story goes.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: justify;"><em>But reading the test results today, it feels like the veil has been lifted from my eyes; mainly that there really is a name for this behavior&#8230;&#8221;</em></p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">So, you are using the test as a tool to validate your own perceptions! And in this process, you are having what this reader shared with us in her letter: a GLORIOUS, REVEALING “EPIPHANY DAY”!</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">What are the three products of this epiphany?</p>
<ul style="text-align: justify;">
<li>You are out of the brain fog;</li>
<li>You stop blaming yourself;</li>
<li>You recover your own mind!</li>
</ul>
<p style="text-align: justify;">And, last but not least, now you can recover your own power: the power of your ideas: the power of thinking clearly and trust your brain again.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">NOW: having an epiphany is good, but it&#8217;s frightening if you don&#8217;t know whatever you are going to do with this insight:</p>
<ul style="text-align: justify;">
<li>You could use this information to kick the table off;</li>
<li>You could use this new info as a permission to fight back;</li>
<li>Or you could use this power to redefine the rules of the game.</li>
</ul>
<p style="text-align: justify;">NOW WHAT? women in the situation like you are in, are probably looking for guidance for their next step. Where to leads the road ahead&#8230;?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Is it true that you need help to be able to see the next steps? Or perhaps what you only needed was having some external tool to clarify your mind, recover your power of planning your own life and now you can continue your path by yourself?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">We will be waiting for your answers&#8230;meanwhile, you too can take the test, use what you know about your husband&#8217;s motivations to do what he usually does when answering the questions, and get the response you need so much. Go ahead, take the <a href="http://passiveaggressivetest.com/passive-aggressive-test/">passive aggressive test</a>&#8230;.we will be waiting for you here!</p>
<div class="neilauthor">
<div id="attachment_61" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 135px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-61" title="Neil Warner" src="http://creativeconflicts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/neil_w1.jpg" alt="Neil Warner" width="125" height="158" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Neil Warner</p></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;m the “relationship guru,” and my main focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship experiences. In this ground-breaking guide I offer useful strategies on healing a difficult, angry relationship with love and compassion. You don&#8217;t have to stay in an unhealthy relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with you today.We can begin by you having a complimentary consultation with <a title="Get Started Now!" href="http://conflictcoach.me/services/getstartednow/" rel="nofollow">Conflict Coach</a>, with a plan for action to change your life with new skills included. Just click this link and get started now!</div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
</div>
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</ol></p>
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		<title>Teaching Your Husband to Stop: Is This the Cure for Your Unhappiness?</title>
		<link>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/teaching-husband-stop-cure-unhappiness/</link>
		<comments>http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/teaching-husband-stop-cure-unhappiness/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 23 Sep 2011 15:08:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Neil Warner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[impact of passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive definition]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passive Aggressive Husband]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive personality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[toxic relationship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[am i passive aggressive]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive system]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passive aggressive test]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stopping passive aggression]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/?p=1020</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Over the years, most of what we&#8217;ve discussed here has been about how to deal with the impact of your husband&#8217;s passive aggressive behaviour in your life. However, not much attention has gone to helping your husband understand what is going on, and to motivate him to change his ways. But now, we have created [...]<p><a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com/teaching-husband-stop-cure-unhappiness/">Teaching Your Husband to Stop: Is This the Cure for Your Unhappiness?</a> is a post from: <a href="http://passiveaggressivehusband.com">Passive Aggressive Husband</a></p>

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Over the years, most of what we&#8217;ve discussed here has been about how to deal with the impact of your husband&#8217;s passive aggressive behaviour in your life. However, not much attention has gone to helping your husband understand what is going on, and to motivate him to change his ways.</p>
<p>But now, we have created a system that does exactly that. Want a peek?</p>
<p><script type="text/javascript" src="http://content.bitsontherun.com/players/R5Hh8oGy-VmpzQiCR.js"></script></p>
<p>If you think that this approach can help your marriage, would you suggest to your husband that he start this process? Taking the <a href="http://passiveaggressivetest.com/passive-aggressive-test/">Passive Aggressive Test</a> is easy and free! After he takes the test, there will be no more confusions: you will know what the next steps are!</p>
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